Mile Posts Along the Road of Life

If life is like a journey…a road trip as it were; then I can look into my rear-view mirror and see more mileposts behind me than are left in front of me.
My road is a bit curvy with lots of bumps and detours. I am not sure how the time passed so quickly; I feel like I was in a hurry and anxious to pass so many of the mile posts along the way.
When you are young, mile posts are closer together, learning to walk and ride a bike, first kiss, getting a driver’s license, first job, high school graduation, moving away from home, going to college, getting married and having our first child.
Now, I just want to slow down and enjoy this part of the trip…enjoy the views, smell the flowers, actually listen to my grandkids and have a substantive discussion with my kids.
I am so grateful that you have been here as I flew past the mile posts, some of you even tried to talk to me and tell me, “CaveGuy, listen, slow down, enjoy this, it goes by quickly, you will miss this in a few years from now.”
I had the music turned up too loud and was driving like an immortal teenager and not like Pard and Sandy out for their daily tour of the town.
But as I am looking at the map, there just are not that many mile posts in front of me. Instead of pushing the accelerator I am more often now driving below the speed limit, figuratively and literally, as I just don’t want to arrive at my final destination early.
You were there with me as I passed most of those mile posts. I helped raise four kids, which means that mostly I just loved my too kind and loving wife, and really, she did the rest.
Sure, like any good dad I made arbitrary rules and drove when we were in the city, but mostly I just said, “Whatever your mom said is what you better be doing when I wake up from my nap as I snuggled into my big over-stuffed chair.”
One of my most cherished realizations was that my kids are smarter than me and know things and can take care of complicated problems.
I may have a few more years’ experience and be a tad bit wiser because as Mark Twain said, “Good judgement is the result of experience and experience the result of bad judgement.'.” I got that well covered.
We were rabid sports parents. I probably offended some of you; sorry, I am wiser now.
I helped get them all through college, saw them get married and have kids. Now I have 13 grandkids of my own. They have brought such a joy to my life and yet I now just add them to the list of things I worry about and pray for.
Twenty years ago, I thought I was going to die, but we made it through the cancer scare and I don’t know if I have made a difference with my new lease on life.
I tried to be helpful, but honestly, I still can’t answer the question why some are saved and live and others die leaving behind a grieving heartbroken family.
I have relished so many experiences these last 20 years. I sometimes get misty eyed just sitting on my porch thinking what I might have missed.
I buried my brother, my dad and my mother. I went to the cemetery to take lilacs to my mom, and I was amazed how many names were now familiar to me. I remember a day when I could only recognize a couple.
And here I am at another mile post, my too kind and loving wife retired from teaching in May, and I am set to retire on July 30, 2022.
I am unsure what to do with inflation and the stock market losing 20 percent. I am trying to calm my nerves but that isn’t easy for a worrier like me.
I wonder how long before I become invisible to the youth centered society we live in. I wonder if my next milepost is a long sickness or losing someone close to me. I do not want either, but I know that we don’t get to choose everything that happens.
Me and my too kind and loving wife actually had an argument the other day about which one of us gets to die first. I am certain I do not want to be in this world without her, like so many of our trips in real life I am happy to go sit on a bench and drink my Pepsi and people watch while I wait for her.
Now after retirement I am looking on my map and there does not seem to be many mile posts left. I am pretty sure what the final stop is.
But, just to be clear I am planning on stopping at every Maverik store between here and there and get my Almond M&Ms and Pepsi. I see no use to show up early! That would be awkward, “Sorry I hate to be late can I check in…or is it check out early?”
I know that before the final stop, that last mile post there are some great experiences if I let myself enjoy them.
Recently, I spent a week with my son in Alaska photographing bears and fishing…that seemed like a worthwhile stop.
I read a book to grandchild …another stop that seemed like a fine moment. I will probably stop and talk to you like other old people used to try and do with me.
I will probably tell you the same story. I will probably ask about your parents and family. Because I now know that this moment in time is to be relished, enjoyed, bathed in.
Now is a good time to eat an ice cream or just sit next to my too kind and loving wife and watch our grandkids play.